I Have a Say in My Life

My husband was called away to work this morning, so it was just the kids and me getting ready for church.  I wanted to go to Mass, but the kids always go to the Baptist church with hubby and me.  I was beginning to stress out about how I would manage both churches without hubby's help.  Also, it is getting harder to go to both churches every Sunday because it feels like a tug-of-war between the differing theologies and both subtly speaking out against the other (in general Cath vs Prot terms, not specifically the two churches battling).

As I struggled with what to do and worrying about my kids protests, I realized something.  I'm almost 40 years old and I realized this:  I have a say in my own life.  I have the decision making power here.  I am the mom and what I say goes.

So, I flat out told my children that their choices for the day was between two local Catholic churches.  My oldest chose one I had never been to before, and that was our adventure.  They protested very little and we generally well behaved during Mass.  They asked questions afterwards and all said they liked it, though it felt long to them (it's shorter than any Protestant service we've attended, but I think not understanding how to follow along made it difficult for them to feel involved).  It's also hard, I know, because in evangelical churches they tend to keep your attention by relaxing etiquette and spoon-feeding you on a more entertaining level.  Music is modern and upbeat.  Sermons contain jokes or object lessons.  Kids can go to children's church, or stay in service, but color, draw, flop around the pews, and take a million bathroom breaks.

Anyhow, it was quite freeing to realize I have the choice in the matter.  Who is anyone to say that I cannot or should not pursue Catholicism when it has already benefitted me so much?  I've always followed my family, spiritually, socially, politically, and have always tried to not be an upstart or a bother to people.  It is a great challenge for me to go against them and their expectations of me.  I know they won't understand how I can begin to believe Catholic theology.  Some, I suspect, even still believe Catholicism is the Whore of Babylon, so they would think I was throwing myself into Satanism in sheep's clothing.

But, I have a say in my life.  Simple as that.